Look people, we’re not idiots. But we come pretty close. And it’s disturbing how many people in this country still believe in the fried egg theory of drug use. You know, the theory that drug use is like frying an egg and then not only destroying the egg, but an entire kitchen full of dishware and cutlery? And not smashed around by just anyone. Smashed around by a mentally ill, but hot girl circa 1998. Huh?

Anti-drug ads are the most hopelessly misguided, cheesy, and profoundly uncool bits of science fiction churned out by the TV. And they usually beg two questions. One - Was it the drug or the personality that made a teen phone his ex girlfriend totally crunked and act like a pathetic ass? Two, why are we so comfortable with our government bleeding our paychecks dry in the name its own concocted myths? The kind of myths that are based on something like 5% of the science.

*Folks, I’m mostly talking about weed here. I acknowledge that cocaine is a hell of a drug.

If the war on drugs has taught us anything, it’s that there’s still a crapload of pot. In fact, many times more than the amount that was present at that silly Woodstock thing. And yes, we’ve seen plenty of degenerates stab their fingers in disrespectful menace at their own democratic representative over this plant. But it seems like great majority of the people in this country have never been that adversely affected by that wacky green weed to be so motivated against it.

So maybe it’s time the government didn’t sponsor really lame ads. Ads that elevate the story of a random nut who shot his friends instead of eating Doritos to the level of a massive threat to the rest of us who don’t mix mental illness and guns. And it’s time we stopped being cool with that. Maybe you should be a little annoyed that the government sponsors people to make these ads. And somehow those brilliant filmmakers missed the news that something like 93 out of a hundred folks who study weed for a living say - well, there ain’t nothing really too bad about it.

So maybe with some ads that don’t treat us like toddlers or the senile - maybe at the very least, we won’t be as inclined to act like a bunch of total jackasses. Because seriously, when we believe this pile of an elephant’s gift to the dung beetle, we’re being jackasses. Brazen jackasses that support something that wastes way more money than’s needed. Not this time, when every time we applaud a penny spent on something stupid gets China a minute closer to owning our future.

And if there’s a way of throwing a lasso on that horrible process and slowing it down...one that usually at worst only makes people buy way too much E.L. Fudge...then I say we’re idiots if we don’t support it.

Honestly folks, try reading about weed.

*photo by Aubergene on Flickr Creative Commons