I have a message for Hillary Clinton. If you’ve never seen “Cool Runnings,” then move it to the top of your Netflix queue. In case you have your heart set on “Atonement,” then I’ll condense the pertinent parts of the movie for you. The Jamaican bobsled team has become a Cinderella sensation on the ice track and is set to take home the top prize in the final race of the film. However, due to a twist of fate and faulty engineering, a bolt on one of the runners comes loose and the team’s sled careens down half the track. Contrary to the usual Disney sports movie model, the hopes for the title are ruined. However, as the bewildered and concerned crowd looks on, the dazed Jamaicans emerge from the twisted wreckage of their bobsled, hoist it to their shoulders, and proceed as if in a funeral march to the finish line. They have conceded defeat, but have retained their dignity and realize that it was astonishing for them to be there in the first place. The crowd goes wild.

You have two choices, Hillary. You can either concede and enter posterity as the humble contender who saved the Democratic Party in 2008 or you can continue to do what you’re doing. That is, you can continue kicking and screaming and drawing out the primary season to the Democratic National Convention in August, where you will most likely get robbed of the nomination regardless.

Since no major media outlet will actually realistically assess Hillary Clinton’s chances (or lack thereof) to win the nomination and the presidency, then I’ll pinch-hit for them. The Clinton camp has been touting the impending Pennsylvania primary as a contest that will somehow radically turn the tide in her favor. While it is safe to say that Clinton will win the state, there is no such thing as a gigantic primary win on the Democratic side in a single state. Unlike GOP primaries, Democratic primaries siphon off delegates according to proportion of the popular vote won. Thus, unless Clinton wins the state 99% to 1%, she won’t make a significant dent in Obama’s lead of pledged delegates. Even if the outcome has Clinton winning by a ten point margin, Obama will still only lose ground on about 20 delegates. Obama currently has a lead of 137 delegates over Clinton going into the Pennsylvania primary. With 501 delegates up for grabs in the remaining primaries after Pennsylvania, Clinton would have to win by a margin of more than 20 points in each state, which is highly unlikely given the tight race outcomes up until this point.

Since the likelihood of Clinton surpassing Obama in pledged delegates by the time of the Convention in August is…nil to nil, the trump card in her favor would be the unpledged superdelegates. A controversial addition to an already idiotic primary process on the Democratic side, the superdelegates could potentially tip the scales in Clinton’s favor. But they run the risk of quashing any fervent voter excitement generated in the Democratic race up until this point if they snub the leader of the popular vote going into the convention. So, unless a story comes out connecting Obama to a child sex slave ring between now and the Pennsylvania primary, Clinton will not have a popular vote lead before most superdelegates cast their votes at the convention. While I’m not certain that the promises college Democrats are making about surpassing the violence of 1968 will come true, at the very least, a nomination of a candidate who had the fewer popular votes will smolder the fire of Democratic fervor and turn it into bitterness.

Unfortunately, that bitterness is already underway. Under a thundercloud of bickering between the two candidates in the past three week, the dreamy-eyed Democratic blather about “hope” triumphing in 2008 is more likely to turn out as “McCain: 57%, (insert Democratic nominee here) 43%.” While it should be painfully obvious by now that Clinton and Obama are nearly identical candidates aside from the obvious differences in genetalia and rhetorical prowess, refusal of the candidates to acknowledge that will only endanger Democratic hopes further. As things stand now, it’s time for the much-enshrined “unity” to actually take precedence. Hillary, it’s not the end of the world. There’s always 2016.